Yet another double-barrelled name problem

How many syllables do you think is too many for a double barrelled surname?I am attached to my surname. I changed it when I became an adult to a name that is within my single parent's family, to feel closer to them and to distance myself from my other 'parent'. The grandparent who brought my surname into the family passed away recently so it feels even more meaningful to me and feels like a big part of my identity. I'm also not a person who blindly follows tradition, so I stubbornly don't really want to give up my surname "just because that's what women do".But, despite all this, I'm leaning towards just going with my fiancé's surname because our names double barrelled together makes for a really long surname.Mine is 7 letters and 2 syllables. His is 12 letters and 3 syllables. We don't want to merge them together to create a new surname because my fiancé wants to keep his. A 19 letter, two part, 5 syllable surname feels excessive. I also don't want to just keep my existing surname because I do want to feel connected to my future husband and I do want to have, at least in part, the same surname as my children (I don't necessarily want to double barrel our children's surname)I could potentially make my current surname into my middle name, but then I'd have to erase my middle name and that also came from a now-deceased family member. I'm maybe willing to do this, though. But I think my original surname would then be ignored anyway if it was my middle name.I feel like there isn't a solution here but I thought I'd ask you all for your thoughts anyway! via /r/weddingplanning https://ift.tt/3lUt9Os